Why Can't We Do It All???!!!!

I am having one of those weeks where all I feel like I am doing is "chasing my tail". To be quite honest, I am just feeling a little defeated. Most of the time, I try looking at the positive side of life and although I am super anal (I know, I know), I do feel like I try and go with the flow (friends, don't laugh!). I know I can't do it all and I feel like I am very good about reminding myself to take baby steps and someday I will get there, maybe.....This week, however, has been a little different for me. Everyday I am trying to be the best mom I can be and I really do just want to do it all! I am super organized  and very passionate about things that are important to me so I feel like when I put my mind to something I can accomplish it. There are so many things that I want to do that I could go on forever, but I feel like I am falling short this week. Normal every day things that wouldn't really be bothering me are weighing on my shoulders.

We have our house on the market and I feel like I am trying to live in a museum in case we have a showing. With that being said, half my stuff is in bins and for the first time I don't know where things are! I am losing everything, my closets and cabinets are cluttered and it's driving me nuts!

Something else I have been wanting to do is start a "grown up" skin care regimen. That's right ladies, this mama is pushing 30 and those wrinkles aren't going away after a good nights sleep. Problem is, how do I know what to get (there are sooooo many lines out there) and then I start thinking of all the chemicals in everything which weirds me out (come on, you know by now I am try to be a tree hugger) and to top it off, I had a consultation today with a girl about an organic skin care line and she basically told me it was "fru fru" and didn't work! UGH! I mean, I am trying here.....

Adding to all of this, you all know my goal for cutting out processed foods, certain ingredients, canning and just all around trying to be as healthy as I can. Well, I was hit with a bombshell. My cholesterol is sky high and my doc wants to put me on meds!!!! WHAT?!!!! I know, I am really feeling it. Long story short, we think it is because of one of two things- I have PCOS (I will talk more about this another time) which is a risk factor for high cholesterol or it is hereditary. To be honest, I think this is what started my whirlwind. I feel like everything I am doing with food is to prevent these health problems and here I am having to face one. I am 29 and am not ready to have to go on meds for the rest of my life. So basically I have three months to try and get things under control. Due to my PCOS my body reacts to sugars and carbs similar to a diabetic so I have start eating "low glycemic foods". I haven't quite figured it all out yet, but I will keep you posted. Also, my OBGYN started me on Metformin which is suppose to help PCOS and get it under control in your body which in turn will hopefully help my cholesterol. If after all of this my numbers come back high then we know it is hereditary... you know what that means... meds. If I have to I will, but I am not giving up yet! If you have any info or good recipes please pass them along! I would greatly appreciate it!

Although I know that I am doing the best I can, the cholesterol thing was a hit in the gut. Am I doing all of this for nothing? It's funny, some days I lay my head on my pillow and say "I am exactly where I am suppose to be and am doing everything to the best of my ability and what is most important to me". Then other days I literally say to myself "what did I do today... what have I gotten accomplished"? I guess that is the battle we all face as moms... we have to juggle many things and some days are just better then others!

So, I am sorry to be a downer today, but I needed to vent to my other mamas because I know you can understand. I know we can't do it all but I really WISH we could :)

This is what makes it all worth it!!!!